Here Lies Good Old Fred - A Great Big Rock Fell On His Head

Apocryphal stories about epitaphs abound in popular culture, especially when it comes to well-known entertainers who number among the deceased. There's just something satisfying about the idea of leaving one last great line behind, though it's a scant few, it seems, who actually go through with it.

Contrary to popular belief, Dorothy Parker's grave doesn't say "Excuse my dust." She doesn't actually have one - she was cremated and her ashes were scattered - but apparently the garden where the ashes were eventually scattered thought to add it to the plaque that commemorates her there.

Thanks to Find A Grave, I have found a few verifiable - and funny - epitaphs from various famous folks:

• Mel Blanc's headstone quotes his famous line, "That's All, Folks!", which, if you think about it, is appropriate on many levels.


• Robert Frost's headstone proclaims: "I Had a Lover's Quarrel With the World."


• Spike Milligan's says, "Duirt me leat go raibh me breoite." (Which is Gaelic for "I told you I was sick.")


• And finally, the headstone that prompted this silly search in the first place, game show pioneer Merv Griffin: "I will not be right back after this message."

(The title of this post originates outside the Haunted Mansion ride at the Magic Kingdom. While most of the Disney World rides offer you some distraction while you wait, the headstones that greet the line for this ride are funny in the most corny, silly, mildly twisted way possible.)